Over the Edge
What it means to accept your reality...while meeting someone who has lived past it...
Prompt 2
“Sad Plot Beats”
9. A character becoming completely at peace with their tragic destiny.
12. Trying so hard time and time again, and not achieving any results.
Trigger Warning: Suicide
I looked out over the river. My feet were unstable from the large rivets, the size of my hand, at the top of the bridge. Rust had long peeled the paint that had probably been celebrated when completed decades ago. The shoes I had worn were showing their age, fraying at the seams with the rubber lifting away. Below was water; a dark, murky siren song.
When we drove into this town, I’d heard its song while we drove past. The obnoxious pop music on the radio was drowning it out enough to stop me from throwing myself from the car. Not that Seth left the doors without child-locking them. He’d learned years ago that I jumped at a simple siren’s call.
The tears had dried. The sobs not even catching in my throat. My heart felt empty, and my soul, I knew, was broken. Cracked in ways that no one could fix. All that was left was the blood from his claw marks dripping down my face onto the torn shirt that hung off me limply. All that was left was a broken, lost, and defeated Omega. Just like the marks on my face, there was no amount of healing that could fix me.
When my small mountain pack got attacked, I thought it was the worst thing that could happen. The fires burned the straw-covered roofs we spent every year checking and filling. The scent in the air was sickening, watching our entire lives, our village, the place we called home be destroyed so easily by wolves who didn’t care about taking over. Their thrill was in the destruction, and in seeing the claws that the Moon Goddess blessed them with, turn against their own kind.
I was wrong. I watched my mother and father die in front of me, their necks broken, bent, bodies crumpled as if their lives had never mattered. The very Alpha who had killed my parents took one look at me and claimed me as his property. Not his mate, which might be its own saving grace.
Two years. Two years of a hell I didn’t even know existed in this world. Two years of pain and suffering for nothing other than catching his eye. Beaten, broken, fucked, chained, dragged around as though I was nothing.
Nothing. I was nothing. Nothing but scars now. No one would miss me. No one would care. No one was left. I was a ghost screaming out into the void with no one answering. Everything that made me was stripped down into just a shadow of a soul.
All it took was one step. Letting it all go. A freedom I hadn’t known in two years. I wouldn’t have to go back. I wouldn’t need to accept the abuse. From this height, there was a chance I wouldn’t even feel my bones breaking against the choppy surface. It would all be over.
My eyes closed for a moment, the skin pulling the wounds open across my face. The wind whipped around, my long hair hitting my shoulder as it blew from east to west. No longer could I smell the scent of his cigarettes as he put them out on my arm. No longer did I feel like I was going to gag with the amount of whiskey that clung to his breath, even when he didn’t drink. I took a slow breath, almost like a starving child when given a simple piece of stale bread. Then I took another, as the crisp night air filled my lungs and cleared my mind.
I wasn’t strong. There was no strength left in my heart, and that had lasted the longest. My body had given up long ago trying to keep me healed. The only thing that I had left was my voice, but even now, the moment I tried to speak, it was just a whisper. Not that anyone was listening. Not if it meant standing up against the Alpha, who wouldn’t hesitate to break your neck.
My butt vibrated, and my entire body froze out of habit. A deep-seated fear crashing into me and threatening to throw me from on high itself. I covered my mouth and tried not to let the sob break from my chest.
That would be him. Telling me I was to come back. To clean off the two she-wolves he’d fucked at home and then let him do whatever he wanted with me. If I hadn’t come back within the time he wanted, the threats would roll in. The easiest for him being that he would just kill me.
I was dead anyway; one way or another. At least this I could choose. This was the path I could carve for myself. Pain that would last but an instant. Nothing compared to what he could do to me. He’d probably change his mind when I was a single drop of blood away from the death. Telling me I’d never escape him. It wouldn’t be the first time he’d threatened and gone back on his threat.
“Ace.”
My eyes widened as I looked to my right. I recognized the Alpha from the pack up north. He frequented the gym I went to in the mornings to try to find a peace that didn’t exist. He had been at my set tonight too. His face etched with horror as I turned my head toward him. I probably looked half dead with the three claw marks slashed across my face. There was more, but my black shirt was soaking up the deep red.
“Ace, don’t. There are other ways. This isn’t the only one.”
I let out a horrible, manic, broken chuckle. “You don’t understand, Alpha. You don’t get it. This is the way. This is the only way.”
“I can protect you. I know it’s a lot right now, but I can.” He was slowly trying to make his way across the beam to me.
Looking back over the water, I could see why some poets romanticized this. The end, the knowing, the darkness, all of it was more alluring than a siren’s song. I was so close.
“Please, Ace. Let me help.”
“I can’t…Alpha.” I gave him a sad smile. “It’s too late. I should have done this a long time ago.”
He was getting closer, and I moved a little away from him. “But you didn’t. You didn’t because you endured. Now, you’re not alone. I am the pack Alpha. I see you, Ace. I see you and I want to help.”
Tears rolled down my face, stinging as they flowed into the open wound. “You can’t! He’s…Seth’s the rogue everyone is talking about. He’s been waiting to attack your pack; looking for an opening. He just hasn’t found one yet! If you…if you take his favorite plaything…” I shook my head as I gave him a sad smile. “I’m not worth the lives of your pack members. I’m nothing. Seth made sure of that. It’s just better this way. I promise.”
The Alpha stood up straight, finally at the top with me. “No one’s life is worth more than someone else’s. No one. Your life means something. You’re here for a reason. Let me be the one to help you find it.”
His hand stretched out to me. It felt too late. If he had only been there a year ago. Maybe even a few months ago. But now? What was I now? The wounds on my face would scar just like every other part of me. I’d be dead running, dead going back, dead taking a step anywhere around me. It didn’t matter anymore, and I was tired. Too tired to take his hand.
“I’m sorry…”
“No!” he yelled at me, and I flinched. “I lost someone dear to me years ago. My fated mate, I found her and loved her. We were young and in love, and then there was an attack. Suddenly, my soul was torn in half, and I was nothing. I was supposed to take over for my father, but I couldn’t. Everyone knew I was broken. A wolf without their mate is a liability, but an Alpha?”
My mouth opened a little, staring at the powerful wolf in front of me. There was no way. He was a pack Alpha. That would leave a lasting scar, and there would be few wolves who would trust an Alpha who lost a mate.
His chuckle was hollow, turning from me to look out over the water. “My younger brother took over until four years ago. The pack was attacked by rogues, and he died with four other warriors. Suddenly, I was all that was left. He hadn’t found his fated and there were no other Alphas. Just me.”
He took a breath before looking back at me. “I’ve been here, Ace. Where you are standing. When the Elders came and told me I was Alpha now. That there was no one left of my family but me. I stood where you are now, and I thought I couldn’t.”
I stared at him, tears still falling. “I can’t…”
“You can’t go back, and I’m not asking you to. I’m asking to trust me when I say I will protect you.” He took two steps, standing a couple of feet away, towering over me. “If you don’t trust me, then let me mark you.”
My eyes widened. “W-What? You can’t be serious.”
“I’m completely serious.”
“You don’t even know me! A mark…that’s…binding. It’s a mark for goddess’ sake! You would be bound to me! Until I died or you died.”
His smile was soft. “I know.”
“That’s…! That’s…!” My eyes searched him, but there was nothing telling me he was joking or playing some cruel joke on me. “I’m not…I’m not worthy. I’m not mate material. I’m broken and used and…and I’m covered in scars. I can barely shift anymore. I’m not good enough for a regular human. Let alone an Alpha.”
“And I’m not mate material either. I’m broken. I have nightmares almost every night, if I sleep at all. The only thing holding me together is my title. I’m not something anyone wants to touch with a ten-foot pole. Not even for a title.”
He reached out and took my hand. “Let me do something. Let me be your Alpha. Ace, let me save you. If I mark you, it’s over. He can’t complain. He doesn’t have a platform to stand on to attack. You get a safe place to stay, with a roof, meals, and I can promise you I will never hurt you.”
I stared down at his hands holding mine. They were cold, shaking just a little, but were firm. A way out. He was giving me a way out. A safe road. One that never should have existed. Yet, here he was, standing next to me on top of a bridge, trying to stop me from jumping.
“Alpha…I…”
“Oliver. My friends call me Ollie. Though there aren’t many left who stuck around after I disappeared into the darkness after my fated passed.”
Closing my eyes, I shook my head. “You don’t deserve to be stuck with someone like me. If you’re already struggling…”
“Then I’ll have someone to struggle next to.” His smile was soft. “I’m not looking for love or a Luna or anything like that.”
“But…!”
Squeezing my hand, Oliver closed the space between us and wrapped his arms around me. “Let me save you, Ace. Let me give you a place you can call home. All I ask is that you just be present in mine. Someone to reach out to when I feel myself slipping.” His arms tightened for a moment. “I wish someone had been there for me when I was here. I was a coward, and it was the only thing that stopped me from taking that step.”
My hands came up, and I grabbed his shirt. His scent was light, the wind blowing too much, but I knew it from when we crossed paths at the gym. It was ginger with a hint of brown sugar. The floodgates opened, and I cried into his chest. He didn’t say anything, just held me as I cried.
The tears that I stuffed down for my mom and dad. Tears for my friends, my pack, and ultimately myself. Mourning what was left of me and everything I had lost. For me, being unable to vent my frustration, my sorrow, and my will to continue. Oliver ran his hand gently over my hair. His touch was light but comforting. A pillar of strength I could lean on.
Shivering, he rubbed my arms. “Come on. Let’s get down. I can turn on the heat in my car.”
We slowly made our way down, but he never let go of me. Not even when he hit a rivet and nearly had to jump down. I was slow and steady until he grabbed my waist, lifted me up, and then set me down. It was slight, but I could see the relief on his face when we were both on the sidewalk.
“How…did you know?”
Oliver squeezed my hand. “One of my pack members saw you walking this way.” He reached up, grimacing as his hand brushed my face. “They said you were hurt, but they didn’t warn me how bad.”
My eyes fell. “It’s going to scar. I’m…mostly scars now.”
“As long as there aren’t any more of these.”
His hand flipped my arm, exposing the scars on my forearm to the world. The lines too neat to have been from a fight. Guilt wove its way through me, wanting me to pull away. It’s why I always wore a long sleeve shirt under my oversized short-sleeved shirts. Not just those, but all the others.
“Promise me.”
I nodded. “I promise, Alpha. This…these…”
Covering my forearm with his hand, Oliver shook his head. “I don’t need you to tell me everything right now. All I need is that you don’t harm yourself in the future.”
Swallowing, I took a breath before looking up at the wolf who was giving me more than I could possibly as for. “Achilles. My full name is Achilles, but…it’s stupid, so I go by Ace.”
Oliver’s every row rose. “Achilles? As in…”
“The Greek warrior only known for his battle wound. Yeah, that one.”
“I mean, it’s kind of cool.” He was fighting a smirk.
Shaking my head, I let out a long sigh. “Thanks, Alpha.”
He pulled me into his arms, and I froze. “Ollie. If you want to call me Alpha in front of others, fine. When it’s just us though, call me Ollie. You’ll see I’m not the same kind of Alpha as others. Not with everything that’s happened. I’ve just been holding down the fort until we can figure something out.”
“Yes, Al-Ollie.” My cheeks flushed. “It might take some getting used to.”
“We will have time.”
I nodded, and for a minute, we didn’t move or speak. He reached up and brushed my neck with his fingers, making me shiver again. Pulling the shirt away, baring my shoulder to him, I held my breath. Oliver’s eyes flashed black, and I tightened my hold on his shirt.
He was actually going to go through with his promise. Right here, under the bridge I nearly threw myself from. There usually would be pomp and circumstance surrounding a marking, ten times the amount for an Alpha. I closed my eyes, unsure if this was really happening.
A cry left me as I felt his canines in my shoulder. Quickly, though, it turned to pleasure, and I felt my knees shake. It wasn’t like anything I’d felt before. I’d come before, but it rarely from pleasure. It was just a bodily instinct to stimulation. Not like this. This filled my entire body and set my nerves on fire.
Something else wove through me. The dying soul inside me felt something more alive than it had been in years. I whimpered as his mouth left my shoulder.
“I’m sorry. Did I hurt you?”
Shaking my head, I swallowed, but even that wouldn’t help me speak. He smiled, brushing some of my hair back.
“Your turn, little wolf.”
My eyes moved from his eyes to his shoulder. Could I? Could I really mark an Alpha? Some who wouldn’t gain anything from helping me and would be stuck with me for the rest of our lives. His fingers brushed my jaw.
“Ace, it’s okay. I know what I’m asking and who I’m asking it of.”
Nodding, I leaned in and moved his shirt aside. It was harder, considering he was wearing one that fit him. After a moment of struggling, Oliver just pulled his shirt over his head. I’d seen him naked in the gym locker room, but it really was amazing how different he was from Seth.
Oliver cared about himself and others. Seth didn’t care about either. The only thing he cared about was his own pleasure in everything. Stepping back up to him, I closed my eyes. It was a struggle to shift anymore and took more effort than it should to shift even just my canines. I opened my eyes once I was able to get them down, and he leaned his head away.
“I’m…biting now.”
He chuckled, but I bit down on his shoulder. It was harder than I thought, having to put more pressure into breaking the skin. Oliver said nothing until I managed to sink my teeth in, blood filling my mouth. Sucking in a breath, his hands grabbed my hips, nails digging in. I quickly retracted, giving his skin a light lick before looking up at him.
“Are you okay?” My eyes looked worriedly at him.
“I’m fine. I’m at least familiar with the feeling. How are you?”
I touched my chest, shaking my head. “I feel…peace?”
Oliver smiled. “You feel me then. Our emotions will be connected. I can feel yours and you can feel mine.”
“Wait! But! You shouldn’t have to deal with my emotions!”
Laughing, he pulled back on his shirt. “I don’t mind, Ace. You’re very good at keeping your emotions from showing on your face. This just means you can’t hide from the world anymore. Or at least from me.”
I throw my hands up. “I would never have agreed to this if I had known you would end up feeling what I do.”
Reaching for me again, Oliver pulled me tight, and I couldn’t help locking up. His fingers brushed my cheek before a sad smile replaced the laughter. Another shiver ran through me, but for an entirely different reason.
“I’m not the only one who’s going to be on the receiving end, Ace. You still need to deal with mine as well.”
Wrapping my hand around his wrist, I held his hand up to my face and leaned against it. “You’re the one saving me. Feeling your emotions is nothing compared to that.”
“You say that now.”
His smile brightened more, and I realized that the smile on his face now was the one I wanted to help protect. Maybe I was a mess. Maybe I was broken. Maybe I was still a step away from tumbling into the dark water. Still, for this Alpha willing to give someone like me a chance, I would try for him. Try to be more and to help him take his own steps forward.
Two broken souls had to make a whole one, right?
Lately, my brain has been the enemy.
It’s refusing to cooperate and it’s frustrating. I do my best, but that means little in the way of focusing and trying to get things to work out correctly. Thousands of words, a mess of stories, and everything feels jumbled. My art reflecting how I feel in my life right now.
And I don’t know how to fix either of them.
There are times where I feel a story rather than know a story. This is one of those times. After going through prompts online, I ended up in the darker side of the prompts (thanks Insta). This group of prompts popped up with the caption, “14 sad prompts that don’t require your character to die”.
It was made me think of the edge, teetering on that edge and accepting that this is the only way. The wind from being up so high. The darkness of the water below. It being a siren song and calling out to someone who has lost literally everything.
Not just family and friends, not just their home or their pack, but lost themselves. Literally their soul crumbling and their heart broken beyond repair. Reaching that point and accepting that.
Suicide is such a tough to truly write and come across those feelings of absolute hopelessness. It’s hard to capture the true depth of that kind of pain.
In this case, Ace was ready to step out. A single movement away. Except a hand extends to him. Not just a way out, but a safe space. Someone who understands what it means to be on the edge, and still struggles with it, but has taken steps toward the future as well. Oliver knows what it means to be there and feel like you’ve lost everything. That heartbreak and broken soul, seeing a reflection of himself in Ace.
It makes him reach out. Makes him decide that against everything, he is willing to pull Ace close and give him another chance to step on solid ground rather than drowning.
As a writer, I find myself always gravitating toward emotion. Wanting my readers to understand what it feels and to feel along with the characters. Coveying those emotions, whether it be pure elation, sorrow, and rage, it’s not easy putting those into words and having someone read them that has never gone what the characters have gone through. Who have never gone through what I’ve been through.
I’m pulling from my own life most of the time and finding the emotions and the heart and retelling it as best that I possibly can. I know sometimes it doesn’t hit, but at others, when I make myself cry, I realize that I did it. I did it and it’s an achievement that I pride myself in as writer.
No matter the story.
No matter the plot.
No matter the fantasy.
If I can make you feel along with me, then I’ve done my job. I’m proud of that.
<3



